is it you? dianna here

Imagine my glee when this found its way into my Inbox this morning:

Do not ignore me please,
I found your email somewhere and now decided to write you.
Let me know if you do not mind. If you want I can send you some pictures of me.
I am a nice pretty girl. Don't reply to this email.
Email me direclty at ddianna0@outmaildirect.info

Well, I could hardly resist, could I? To make things more interesting this time around, I decided to write back only generic replies, so that I can re-use them for future baiting:

I was quite surprised to receive your email, as I'm not sure we've ever met, and I don't know where you would have seen my email address. That said, I have no objection to you writing to me, and would love to see your pictures

Let the games begin!

Synopsis

On Wednesday 18th July 2007, a rare item of spam found its way into my mailbox out of the thousands that get shunted aside by Gmail. Normally, I'd just mark it as Junk Mail and spend no further time on it, but something about the tone of the email caught my attention, or perhaps it was just that I had time on my hands. Either way, I read through the email, and realised that it was a fairly common twist on the basic Russian bride scam. It occurred to me that it might be fun to respond and see how far I could push the scammer, and have a bit of fun with my replies at the same time. It amazed me in the end just how far I was able to take this and how much information I gleaned out of it.

I've backdated the entries to coincide with the actual email dates, so you can follow the story from the oldest entry forwards for maximum effect. Hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed running it!

I need you.......

Right on schedule, and exactly as anticipated:

Good morning my lovely Henry!!!
I hope, that you O'k!!! It's so???
I have good news and bad. I get my visa today, but it had some difficulties.
When I have come in embassy to me have told, that it will be really difficult. They made check my visa and my travel in your country. It is very difficult however. When I have come to embassy the ambassador asked the many questions. He has asked a question on that who will bear the responsibility about me when I shall be in the your country.
I informed to him that I can take care of myself itself. He has told that knowledge of English language it insufficiently to be in safety.
The ambassador informed me that I should have relatives or the guarantor to fly in the your country. I informed the ambassador that I have no relatives living on territory the your country. I have told to the ambassador about our correspondence with you, but he has told to me, that we
should be familiar long time that you could take the responsibility for me and informed that it will not work. It has very difficult system however.
But they offer to me an exit from this situation. They have told, that I can buy the insurance document. It will have the responsibility for my life in your country. They have told, that if I want to receive visa I should buy this document. If I shall not make this document I never can receive the visa.
I never faced with such problems. I have decided to take consultation from the lawyer all over again. I took consultation from him. I have told to it, that after William has deceived me, I began to search, that person who wants to have and develop relations together with me. I have told him, that now I have very serious relations with you. The lawyer has told me, that it is good, but it will not work for embassy. It is connected by that we are familiar with you not a plenty of time.
The embassy will refuse in receptions of the visa. He has told, that I bought the insurance document. It is a unique correct and reliable choice.
After that I have gone in embassy and we made registration of the insurance document for me.
This document has cost 520 pounds. I had at myself 600 pounds. These are money for purchase of the ticket and residing in your country. Now I have 80 pounds. It will not be enough. I can not arrive to you. Now I need 450 pounds to arrive to you. I understand, that it is very difficult.
But I never collided with such problems. I did not know, that it is so difficult. But I know, that I made a correct choice. I have made everything that we had a meeting with you. I very much want it. If I have not paid this insurance document I never would receive the visa.
But now I have it. I have all documents to arrive to you and we shall have a happy pair
together. But I need 450 pounds. I very much sad!!!
My heart belongs to you. I know, that it is destiny. I am filled with emotions now. I think, that it will work. I do not know, that you think about it. Probably you will not help me and we shall never have a meeting. I do not want it. I want to be only with you. If you can make help for us I shall be very happy. I hope for it very much. It's only your choice.

I send this letter to you with hope, that you will not push away me.
I hope, that all our letters were not an empty phrase.
I am valid need in you.

Yours Tatyana.

P.S I am online now, please to write to me as soon as possible.

One swift response should be all that was needed to get to the heart of the scammer scam; a real identity and address for the scammer or accomplice. I play the following very straight, to ensure I don't scare anyone off at this crucial phase:

I do not want it. I want to be only with you. If you can make help for us I shall be very
happy.

That's horrible! How could they charge you so much for insurance? Are you sure you weren't overcharged? I suppose it doesn't matter now though; the money's been spent and at least you've got the visa.

I send this letter to you with hope, that you will not push away me.

How could I push you away after all your lovely letters and pictures and kisses? I'm just not sure how I can help you. What can I do to help? If I write to the embassy, and confirm that I can guarantee accommodation for you over here, maybe they'll let you get a refund on the insurance so you can get a ticket. Or, if you're not to proud to borrow money, I could buy you a ticket and you could pay me back when you get some work? I don't know what you'd prefer, but please let me know how I can help - I'd hate for all your planning to go to waste.

Whoops! There it is:

My love Henry!!!
I am very happy to receive your letter and to know that you very much to want our meeting. I as very much loved your beautiful letters, and now for me is very important to have our meeting. I as want to tell, that in embassy to not give the letter to us the big help because I already spent money for insurance, and now I to have my visa and the insurance document. All that I to require now, it only money for my ticket.
The matter is that I should buy the ticket independently. Also should do it already today or tomorrow. Lovely, to me have told, that the best way to send money is Western Union or Money Gram.
That you might transfer this help to me you should know:

1) My full name - IVANOVA OLGA
2) My full address - Russia, Yoshkar-Ola, Vashskay 19.
That I might receive money I should know:

1) Your full name
2) Your full address
3) MTCN is a confidential code which to you will give after transfer of money.
I very much hope, that you can send 450 pounds and when I to arrive, I was necessary to find work and to give this money to you.
I kiss you, and I wait for your letter.
Yours Tatyana

So, Miss Olga Ivanova, I have you now! I immediately notified both Moneygram and Western Union that I have reason to suspect that fraud is being perpetrated on those details. I also raised the matter with the Ic3, on the chance that it might help some other poor soul.

Since I had the opportunity, I thought I'd push my luck a bit:

The best way to send money through the WESTERN UNION.

Ok, I'm making progress on that. I've given them your details, and the amount that I want transferred. If it's okay with you, I'd like to send a little more than you're asking for, just so you've got funds to show immigration when you arrive here. It just stops them asking awkward questions. So, I'd like to send you £1000, is that ok? You wouldn't have to pay it all back - think of the extra as a welcome gift to the UK.

Because it's not a transfer for business purposes - there's no invoice or any other written request for money - they're asking me to provide photo identification of the recipient, i.e. you. Apparently it's a security measure they've got to prevent the wrong people from collecting money transfers.

Would it be possible to email me a scan of the front page of your passport, please? Actually, any photo id will be fine, as long as it shows your name and your picture. As soon as I can give them a copy, they can authorise the transfer, and I'll have a collection number for you!

Yours in delighted anticipation,
Henry

To my great delight, it worked:



I have very little doubt that it's a bogus ID, though, but I can only hope, right? On the principle that time wasted by the scammer on this scam is time taken from another, I decided to send Olga on a fool's errand:

I wait your help.

All done. They say it'll take about 10-15 minutes to clear through, but then you should be able to pick it up at any Western Union branch.

Here are the details:
MTCN: 2926556292
Sender: Henry Cummings
Address: 14 Chalk Hill Road, Norwich, UK

Almost there...

Henry

Tomorrow my visa!

Ah, this is more like it! Someone has realised how important that final push is:

Hello my lovely Henry!!!
Good evening!!! How passes your day today? I hope that you to have very good day and you today not once to think of me and about our meeting. I hope that our meeting to do so that you to move faster and you to hasten to read my mail and when you receive it you is really happy.
I am valid I can not wait more our meeting, I will think that it very beautifully when we to meet. For these some days I very strongly to get used to you and now I to not represent, that will be if we to not meet. Our meeting is really very important for me, now it is an overall objective during my life.
Tomorrow there will be the most responsible day in all our history and a meeting. Tomorrow I to go in embassy and to receive my visa, whether I to understand that it is very much exciting moment during my life and that depends on tomorrow's day that there will be our meeting. I shall have many questions from your ambassador and he will speak with me and whether I can decide to visit your country.
You should not worry, I will think that all well and our meeting will be the best ending in our correspondence.
When I receive my visa I can to go in travel agency and to buy my ticket, I really think that we shall not have what problems and our meeting will be very fast.
I very much ask to not break my heart, for it let and not big time I really to fall in love with you, and now I do not want that you have broken my heart. I to think of you and about our meeting many times and I to understand that the letter to give us not so much, how many we shall receive when we shall have our meeting. When we shall meet we can to speak, and to learn more about us. I really want to appear in your embraces and to be yours, I very gentle woman which want only love and caress. I want to have only good and happy family, and I think that we can
to find it in our attitudes. I understand that we simply should have our meeting. As I to trust now to you, I want to give for you a small gift. I will think that it very much to like you and you to love me even more. I to send you my very good picture, and I want to tell to you that all this that that you will have when we will together. And I will promise you that all this to yours when, we will to love us. I to trust in that that I to not be mistaken in the choice and I to find which that person I searched.
I really should go to sleep now. At us in Moscow really now night, and I shall sleep now. Tomorrow I shall have very heavy day, I shall be nervous much, but I will think that my excitements are vain.
Have good day today, and I hope that you to think about our meeting during all day. And I will be valid to think that my picture to like you.
Gentle and soft kisses for you, up to a meeting.
Yours Tatyana,

Did you notice a little judicious application of guilt there? By this point, I'm not even maintaining the vaguest pretense of interest, and simply enjoying writing the most outrageous things I think I can get away with:

Good evening!!! How passes your day today?

It's been ever so slow, and I've had very little to do except think of you and everything I'm going to do with you.

You should not worry, I will think that all well

I will be thinking of you, and wishing you the best

I very much ask to not break my heart

Well, I've been very clear that I think you're being a little naive to get so emotionally involved with so little encouragement, but it is very endearing nonetheless. If you're as cute in person, I can't imagine there being any problems.

I to send you my very good picture

And a very lovely picture it is. I'd lecture you again about trusting men you've not met with your gorgeous body, but then I'm afraid you wouldn't hold it against me, so no more of that from me.

I shall be nervous much, but I will think that my
excitements are vain.

I'm sure you'll be fine. Chin up, chest out, back straight, knees spread - like a soldier, you will overcome!

Your faithful master,
Henry

Tomorrow's V-day, and should prove to be interesting indeed...

Moscow!

Hello my love Henry!!!
Good morning for you my love!!! I was really very happy to receive your letter and it to do me the happiest woman all over the world, I to not know now as to me to wait our meeting. I have bad dream because I cannot sleep, I think of you and about that that I really shall be happy only with you. I to see your picture and I to see in your eyes that you which that person I searched for all life and I could not find it in Russia, and now when we to have our correspondence I to understand that I is happy.
I would like to clear up in that that I am in Moscow now and I wait my visa here, I should go tomorrow in embassy and receive my visa. As I already to write to you I to be in Moscow and I it is necessary to go in the Internet of cafe to write to you, I to not have a computer in my hotel and I should speak with you only when I to go in cafe.
In Yoshkar-Ola I live with my parents and my parents to see your picture and they to speak that they not against that that I to find more adult the man for myself. To me to speak that the main thing is love. I think that if we really shall love each other when we shall meet that I should undertake trip to Russia only to prolong my visa, and then perhaps we could have our family and to be happy together.
I hope that you to understand all that I to write to you and now you only to wait our meeting, I very much wait for tomorrow's day, I can receive my visa, I will think that this fine time.
I have today excursion on Moscow and it was valid very interestingly for me. I visit last time Moscow in 1995 and I was still very young girl, since then Moscow has very strongly changed. New buildings of shops are constructed many, people began what that others, all where that hasten and run. Everyone is engaged in the business. I had an opportunity today study the Red area, all who when or was in Moscow necessarily comes here and walks here. As people visit Lenin's mausoleum. If you know this person the leader of our people and his body is stored as a mummy with many years. Every year his body dries out also it become ever less and less. It want bury, but why that do not do it.
When I walk today on Moscow I thought about our meeting much, and thought of that as we can as study your city and you will show me sights of the city. It is very interesting to study another's city and look new places. I very much want our meeting and I think that we shall spend very good time together. Please write me what cities and the countries you visited earlier and what city is your most favourite city? You like to visit other countries? Please write me more your and the life? Tell me that you like and what is your hobby?
It really is very interesting me and I frequently think of you and I want know you better. Write to me more about that as has passed your day. I kiss you and I wait for your letter.
Yours Tatyana.

Another duplicate picture? You'd think a harder try would be in order this close to the end:

I have bad dream because I cannot sleep

Oh, I'm sorry to hear that. There's nothing more nerve-wracking than waiting for a visa to come through, I know.

I should speak with
you only when I to go in cafe.

That's quite alright. I don't live on the internet either.

perhaps we could have our
family and to be happy together.

For a while, at least.

Please write me what cities and the countries you visited earlier and what city is
your most favourite city? You like to visit other countries?

I've been to most of the major cities in the UK, and abroad in Europe a little as while. Warsaw was quite memorable, but my favourite would have to be Zagreb. It was an unforgettable experience, you could say.

Please write me more your and the life? Tell me that you like and what is your hobby?

Um. Well, there's my pet Architeuthis Dux. You'll be meeting him, that's for sure! - got to do something with the pieces of the body :P

Until then,
Henry

hi

Oooh! 'Tatyana' almost blows all 'her' hard work:

Good evening for you my love Henry!!!
I hope that your day to pass well and you have lead very good Today. I am happy that this day to end and up to our meeting remains ever less to time. Each last day to approach me to you...................... To you my love. I to think of it every minute and I to admire with that that I to find you. I the HAPPIEST WOMAN of Russia.................. BECAUSE I SHALL be With YOU.
I SHALL LOVE YOU.
Today I to see many happy people..................... I to go on Moscow and to see that people love each other. But I to understand what even now when I am not near to you, my heart belongs to you, and I want that you loved me. Loved me as you to love me in your letters.
You are very good to concern to me, any person in Russia to not love me as you, you very kind person. My heart as very kind and you will already see it in environment...................... I shall do care ofyou................... About your house.I cannot believe to that that I to meet you.

I very much to trust in the God..................... And I to thank the God that it to do for me a meeting with you. I always to trust in the God, my life was not so much well, but I knew, that I shall be happy. It is happy because I to do all that I was happy........................... I to think that the person himself to do the happy. When it is impossible to sit and wait that the happiness will come in your house.
I in due time to do to meet you. I to do so, that I to find you..................... Now I to receive my
visa............................. And I shall soon fly to you. And to do it I for my and your love.
I wish to tell to you many thanks that you to write to me the letter................... You have answered me. And you to do it for and my happiness. We with you have made us happy..................... Thanks the God for it.
Today there was a heavy day.............. I to take walk of the pedestrian much, and now I to go to sleep. Let my dream will be only about you........................ I wish to see you in my dream. I want that you saw me in the dream and your dreams.................. Dreams of love and passion.
I kiss you my love.
For ever yours Tatyana.

Good evening for you my love!!!
I hope that your day to pass well and you have lead very good Today. I am happy that this day to end and up to our meeting remains ever less to time. Each last day to approach me to you...................... To you my love. I to think of it every minute and I to admire with that that I to find you. I the HAPPIEST WOMAN of Russia.................. BECAUSE I SHALL be With YOU.
I SHALL LOVE YOU.
Today I to see many happy people..................... I to go on Moscow and to see that people love each other. But I to understand what even now when I am not near to you, my heart belongs to you, and I want that you loved me. Loved me as you to love me in your letters.
You are very good to concern to me, any person in Russia to not love me as you, you very kind person. My heart as very kind and you will already see it in environment...................... I shall do care ofyou................... About your house.I cannot believe to that that I to meet you.
I very much to trust in the God..................... And I to thank the God that it to do for me a meeting with you. I always to trust in the God, my life was not so much well, but I knew, that I shall be happy. It is happy because I to do all that I was happy.........................

.. I to think that the person himself to do the happy. When it is impossible to sit and wait that the happiness will come in your house.
I in due time to do to meet you. I to do so, that I to find you..................... Now I to receive my
visa............................. And I shall soon fly to you. And to do it I for my and your love.
I wish to tell to you many thanks that you to write to me the letter................... You have answered me. And you to do it for and my happiness. We with you have made us happy..................... Thanks the God for it.
Today there was a heavy day.............. I to take walk of the pedestrian much, and now I to go to sleep. Let my dream will be only about you........................ I wish to see you in my dream. I want that you saw me in the dream and your dreams.................. Dreams of love and passion.
I kiss you my love.

For ever yours Liliya.

Spot that? I was sorely tempted to call the scammer's bluff at this point, because they couldn't possibly believe that anyone is stupid enough to miss that duplication and name change:

I hope that your day to pass well and you have lead very good
Today.

Not so good, I'm afraid. Some little bugger obviously decided that it would be funny to glue random pages together in one shelf of books, and I've had to take them out of circulation and re-order them all. So angry! There's another reason I'm a card-carrying member of the VHEMT.

I SHALL LOVE YOU.

You don't know that! You really need to reel it in; don't put yourself in so much risk! There are so very strange people out there. I should know!

You are very good to concern to me

Aw, shucks, 'tis nothing *blush*

I very much to trust in the God..................... And I to thank the God

God? Which one? Could it be that I have met a fellow Shub-Niggurathian? Oh happy day!

you..................... Now I to receive my
visa............................. And I shall soon fly to you.

You'll know tomorrow, right? Oh, I hope it all goes well for you. Crossing fingers and eyes...

I want that you saw me in the dream and your
dreams.................. Dreams of love and passion.

Oh, no doubt about it. Exquisite torments galore.

Regards,
Henry

P.S. Who is Liliya?

But the wriggling commenced; 'Tatyana' really thought it could be explained away:

I to not know who is Liliya.
It is probable to have it a mistake in my computer who to name it not my name.

Tatyana.

I let it go, looking forward to the grand finale too much:

I to not know who is Liliya.
It is probable to have it a mistake in my computer who to name it not my name.

Ah, okay. Don't worry about it, these things do happen. Take care, and have a lovely evening. I'll be heading home soon, and look forward to seeing you soon and hearing from you sooner...

Warm regards,
Henry

And 'Tatyana' breathed a sigh of relief, I'm sure:

My love Henry!!!
I am very happy, that we shall have our meeting.
It is very important for me.......... I shall think that we to have very good time together.
Now I to go to sleep, and I hope that tomorrow in the morning I shall see your letter.
I wish to have good evening.
I kiss you.
Yours tatyana.

Good morning for you!!!

Hello my lovely Henry!!!
How there is your day??????? I very much want that each your day was as if a fairy tale, a fairy tale which when to not come to an end, and I want that your ideas were about me.
I am happy to receive each your letter, let it not so is frequent, but me to please, that I am am waited by the person which to wish to see me. To wish to love me and to meet me as princess:)
I to understand that your day is more borrowed than mine because you to be in the city, you to do the business and consequently your day to pass more quickly.
My day goes not so quickly because in Moscow I to not have friends, and I simply to go one on city. Today I was on the area refers to " MOUNTAINS VOROBEVY ", it really is very beautiful a place, here there is university MIHAIL LOMONOSOV, you when be to hear about it? Here to study it is a lot of people from the different countries, and continents. I when to not think, that Moscow so is beautiful, but now, I am happy that I to see Moscow.
I hope that when I to arrive to you, I can see many beautiful places your country, I to see and hear about your country much, and it always to admire me. I am very raised that up to our meeting to remain ever less than time. On Wednesday July, 25, I shall receive my visa, and already in Thursday, I can fly to you. In Wednesday when I to receive my visa I to inform you an exact times and the terminal when and where I shall arrive. I shall do it so that it was convenient for you. Because I want that we were happy together and had good time. Now I shall go to my hotel of and to take not many rest. But in the evening, I shall necessarily write to you mine letter.
I as hope that I to receive the letter from you. I kiss you also wait for your letter.
For ever yours Tatyana.

Recycling pictures now? I'm guessing there must be a limited collection of images for each identity. Either that, or the scammer's getting sloppy as the crescendo approaches.

How there is your day???????

Well, just getting the library ready for opening at 10, but thought I'd check my email first, and was very happy to see not just 1 but 2 messages from you. Thank you.

I very much want that each
your day was as if a fairy tale

Hopefully not one of the Grimms' though, right? :P

To wish to love me and to meet me
as princess:)

Roleplay, eh? We like role play. You can be the princess, and I'll be the swarthy villain come to rescue you from your innocence.

you to be in the city, you to do the business

Well, 'city' is a pretty grand term for Norwich, but it does have a cathedral and the requisite population, so I guess it's close enough. My days aren't that busy, though, except for some bursts of activity just after schools close and again just at the end of the working day, so I would be happy to hear from you lots more today. Keep sending those pictures, too; they're wonderful, um, 'inspiration'.

Today I was on the area refers to " MOUNTAINS VOROBEVY ",
it really is very beautiful a place

It reminds me a lot of the view from Greenwich Park in London. I'll have to take you there.

I hope that when I to arrive to you, I can see many beautiful places
your country

Oh, that there are. I'm sure you shall see many of them before the end.

On Wednesday July, 25, I shall receive my visa, and already
in Thursday, I can fly to you.

Touch wood nothing goes wrong. It would be awful if your visa were delayed for some reason. - providing an opening

For ever yours Tatyana.

For ever, indeed.
Henry